“The simplest questions are the most profound.”― Richard Bach, Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah.
Profoundness in simplicity or simplicity in profoundness, either way you look at it, Sunayana has developed a sense of repaying to the community, expanding these values to human relationships, these simple yet deep-rooted ethics are valuable treasures worthy of inheritance and propagation.
Born in Srinagar Sunayana moved with her family to Jammu in 1985 making it very hard for her to leave friends behind and move to an unknown area. She continued visiting Srinagar multiple times a year during vacations and at one point her parents planned to move her back to Kashmir in Grade 10, which with the advent of unrest in the state, did not see the light of the day. Her childhood memories are intricately shaped by her family, culture and surroundings, some significant, some trivial. As though her life story were a recorded movie, even if not in accurate sequence the recollection makes an exquisite panorama.
“Nostalgia, is an indulgence of a tranquil state of mind. When I think of my childhood, it comes to me in images, one frame at a time. My great-grandma walking in her pheran, neighbour roasting potato in Kangri, Satsang in temple during Janmashthami, our family priest performing pooja on Shivrati , early morning Azaan, Raj begum crooning ‘mashravthas janaan, che kar yaad pemai bu’, Lata Mangeshkar singing ‘ Rahein na rahein hum’, Daddy leaving for work singing a latest hindi film song.”
“These frames come in slow motion now . Some days they bring pleasure , some days smile and then somedays this loss of childhood is hard. There were very few concerns and unlimited fun, climbing apple trees was an afternoon ritual, each one had a branch designated, trespassers were treated fairly, while we were generous to share the fruits occasionally, we were dignified enough to respect the boundaries and territories. The umpteen times that we used to slide on the haystack in ‘dragur’,the common area of play, going to fields. The lack of organized and structured play ensured that running around aimlessly was best way to spend time.”
“Aadhi-aadhi baantee humne gud ki roti thiTab doston mein siyasat kahan hoti thi”
“We were a very close-knit community. My father’s best friend Ali Uncle lived nearby and his son Sahaba and another cousin Bablu were my friends and classmates. Mamaji who owned the only grocery shop in our area was my Grandfather’s maternal uncle and was actually related to many other Pandit families around, his granddaughter Renu was my playmate.”
“We were the first ones to get the T.V set, it seems it came much before my birth probably in 70’s. So Sunday movie meant visitors and lots of kids too. I was exposed to movies, songs, literature at a very early age. We were a household with deep influences of Karl Marx, Kaifi Azmi, Lal Ded, Sahir. One word for my childhood — Perfect !”
Kashmir for a long time offered social harmony and kinship, social interdependence pervaded, people were deeply involved with others and life was shaped by several spiritual and philosophical traditions, reflecting a true Indian society. However, all this changed in late eighties, as the decline started appearing.
“I was too young to understand ‘discrimination’. The only thing I recall was the tension around cricket matches between India and Pakistan; suddenly my best friend would turn s stranger. The lines were clearly drawn. If there were issues my parents clearly shielded me from those.”
“This ofcourse changed in 1989 summer when we were visiting Kashmir, things had taken a strange turn, I recall being at my maternal house near Baghaat and sensing this fear at night because of the conversations around. Who would have known that only a few months later it would all explode! My Mamaji was forced to run through the fields when he was informed that his name was on the local hitlist of militants.”
“Many of our relatives lived with us for a few years in Jammu. Have you seen the eyes of the people who has endured genocide? There is some kind of hopelessness in them. When dad’s cousin Kashi Nath uncle who had returned to the valley with his family was shot in Kashmir, our realities changed forever.”
Our lives have become a collection of stories about victimisation and resilience, we remember the experiences of homelessness and the tumultuous journeys to exile. The stories unearth the manifold meanings of home and flight, the development of survival strategies and the ability to deal with conflict. Our attachment to memories of ‘home’ comes masquerading in various forms.
“I miss everything about Kashmir, there was so much culture and talent. I have been particularly inspired by Lal Ded, Arnimaal, Mahmood Gami, Dinanath Nadim, Shameema Dev, Bhajan Sopori, Raj Begum,Vidhu Vinod Chopda, Subhash Kak, Pran Kishore ji.”
“The songs that resonate with me the most are ‘Che kamyu karninay taveez pann’, ‘Che yeevan rosh chukh natte’, ‘Kansi maa raavyin shur-e-paan’, ‘Ha saadan hind saadho’, ‘Bu gyav na azz su nagme’, ‘Mashraev thas janaan’, ‘Yumbarzaloo’ — Not just because I have written it but the composition and the way the video was directed. This is very close to my heart.”
“And I love listening to Vijay Malla, Shameema Dev, Dhananjay Kaul, Vibha Saraf, Yawar Abdal, Aabha Hanjura.”
And then there are dreams, they give us a reason to keep going and make life worth living irrespective of the circumstances. Across an individual’s lifetime, goals keep evolving, our life situations change but our dreams still follow us. Our changes and new knowledge reflect in our aspirations and we keep them renewed to complement our evolving selves.
“Dreams keep changing, one thing that I never dreamed of doing was ‘writing’. I always wanted to sing, then I wanted to become a doctor, however that dream fizzled out as soon as the benzene ring extended its structure in 12th grade. At one point I wanted to come to the US, though it seemed so far- fetched then, one fine day I was sitting on a plane to New York city for work. I get bored very quickly and my attention span is very limited, so I don’t like one thing for long.”
“Ragon mein jamm na jaaye laho ko ravaan mileMain asmaan chuon to naaya aasmaan mile”
“My craziness drives me and the fact that I am OK to walk alone. I hate predictability. When I write similar kind of stuff, I hate it. There was a phase where I started to write for ‘effect’. It was a cute little phase by the end of which I had to reprimand myself. I am my biggest critic and have no problem dumping my work if I feel it is ‘blah’. I read books and that I feel is the best ‘riyaz’ for a writer. Also, when the realities of this world don’t make sense I escape and hide in books. I am very fortunate to have been married to someone who is completely different to me, our tastes may not match but our values do, it brings a sense of balance in my life.”
Sunayana’s journey is like climbing each step of a ladder; each stride giving her a unique and valuable experience. She has stood upright on the ladder, extending to a great height, supported by a solid ground that symbolizes, among other things, faithfulness, integrity and honesty — these in turn define her persona.
“I moved to the USA in the year 2000, for work. I have been here since. I published my book of poems ‘Waqt se pare -Beyond Time’ in the year 2013 and have been engaged in the creative field ever since. The transition to movies was quite accidental and very revealing as well because it took me back to my roots -to Kashmir. My present collaboration with Renzufilms has been quite fulfilling. We are on our 5th project together.”
“Recently I collaborated with an India based poet Monika Singh to launch our poetry show ‘Zikr Uska’. I have been fortunate to collaborate with singer/producer Anuradha Palakurthi for various songs including the song for ‘ekal vidyalaya’ which was released by the Govt of India was one of the key milestones of my life besides collaborating with Sonu Nigam and meeting Gulzar saab.”
“I am completing nearly two decades in the US. This country has given me a new perspective on everything. It is a melting pot of sorts, in terms of culture, food, languages and races. There is abundance of everything here, loneliness too, so I visit India at least once a year to nurture my roots, my creative side as well.”
I learned about Sunayana from a good friend Aalok Aima and through him I connected with her on Facebook. My natural inclination towards the middle path, impartiality, compassion and empathy always attracted me to people who demonstrate such traits and values. I felt a connection and was extremely impressed by Sunayana — her flair for poetry and free verses, her creativity, her deep understanding of sensitive issues and her approach towards reconciliation. She came across as someone who had gained emotional maturity and objectivity. In pursuit of her passion for writing she has emerged as a fine poetess and lyricist, her weapon being her verses- she could well be a reformer. I have not met Sunayana in person but observed her on social media, I found her to be extremely considerate and perceptive, the subtle romance in her poems, the sensitivity towards social and political issues, the ability to view life from an ingenious lens, all made her very inspiring.
Kashmir being a sensitive subject, more so for those who were forced to live in exile, rarely does one come across a person who expresses her own anguish and disappointment without being bitter and vindictive, Sunayana has moved beyond hearsay and empty rhetoric only to emerge as a true artist who finds the beauty amidst ugliness, hope within despair and tranquility in chaos. Sunayana merits kudos for her outstanding work, skills and ofcourse her spirit.
Please do watch the movie ‘Half Widow’. Lyrics and Dialogues written by Sunayana Kachroo. https://in.bookmyshow.com/delhi/movies/half-widow/ET00119122?fbclid=IwAR2z8WkL-md4QXFdDs7KQTCVQZr445uDU1l64d6ATsQabE_QPU5sP0AxDSw
SUNAYANA KACHROO BHIDE (https://sunayanakachroo.com/biography/)POET, FILM WRITER, LYRICISTBorn and brought up in Kashmir, Sunayana has a Master’s degree in Computer Science, she moved to USA in 2000 for work and currently lives in Boston area with her family. Her first poem was published at the age of 15. In 2013 her first book “Waqt Se Pare –Beyond Time”, an anthology of poems and pictures was published. She was a featured Poet and Panelist at the prestigious “Bangalore Literature Festival- 2014 and Harvard University’s – Annual Poetry Reading event -sponsored by South Asia Institute. She has been invited by the Indian Consulate General New York, many times to recite her poems.
“Every person, all the events of your life are there because you have drawn them there . “― Richard Bach, Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah.
Undoubtedly Sunayana is a woman of strength and purpose, her creativity energizes her as well as those she attracts into her life.
Originally published on January 5, 2020 at https://www.facebook.com/notes/1009702849530100/
© Jheelaf Parimu Razdan
