The manifestations of the mode of goodness can be experienced when all the gates of the body are illuminated by knowledge~ Bhagavad Gita 14.11
Gita says there are nine gates in the body and in every gate, when the symptom of goodness is illuminated, it should be understood that one has developed the mode of goodness. In the mode of goodness, one can see things in the right position, one can hear things in the right position, and one can taste things in the right position. One becomes cleansed inside and outside. In every gate there is development of the symptoms of happiness, and that is the position of goodness.
With exile came pain and experience, yearning and learning, bitterness and memories, the floodgates of emotions were thrown open and each one of us became vulnerable to myriad of trials, trysts with misfortunes — a long rendezvous with irony. Yet majority fostered the ‘mode of goodness’ and chose their own unique paths to ‘illumination’.
Rahul Bhat — whose ordinariness makes him extraordinary — chose his own journey and medium to reconnect with his roots while merging the extant with his life.
“My grandfather is a retired policeman, and my grandmother is one ‘blue eyed Kashmiri beauty.’ My father and mother are government employees. I have a younger sister. We have always lived together as a joint family — be it in Kashmir in our ancestral house or in a one room rented place in Jammu.”
This young man from Wachi in Shopian was only a year old when he was forced to flee from his village, where his forefathers were born and lived for centuries. He obviously has no memories of Kashmir, but has experienced it through the stories narrated by his grandparents and parents. Through their narratives, he has imagined what his home would have been like, what would vudr (elevated table-land) have looked like and how as a kid he would have loved to play in the snow. He recollects the chilling stories of Yach (tutelary spirit) and Raahchok (legendary animal).
Interestingly Rahul’s grandmother Smt. Kishni Bhat is the daughter of late Pt. Vaishan Razdan, who wrote ‘Paadi Kamlan Talle Bu Aaisyi’ and many other bhajans while sitting in the Martand Temple.
“She had a remarkable memory and could recite all his poems. It was with her and others’ help that a book on all his poems was published. Her Alzheimer’s started with forgetting the things she just said. We had to repeat to her who the guests were and where they came from and where they stayed in Kashmir, after every ten minutes.”
“She forgot everything about her life in Jammu but somehow remembered minute details of her life in Kashmir. She slowly started forgetting our faces. We had to remind her who we were.”
“I was so hurt when she forgot me for the very first time and I had to remind her who I was.”
“Now she has Parkinson’s as well, I guess. She cannot move on her own, her nervous system is damaged. We have to clean her, feed her and now she doesn’t remember anything. But whenever we start singing Kashmiri poems of her father, she starts singing along.”
From Wachi on the banks of the beautiful Rambi Ara river, with free flowing water and ‘hidden treasures’ to living in one room in Jammu, with many family members, the life of this daughter of the valley speaks volumes of the trauma our community went through. And Rahul has captured glimpses of her helplessness in a short film, which moves even the heartless to tears.
Watch here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qy65y_acXj8
A defeat in game of dice led to exile of the Pandavas. One wonders, we did not even gamble or bet, we had so much at stake, yet no choice! Forcibly locked in our incognito and our children still searching their identity; unanswered questions inherited by generations. And the responses? merely the echoes of obscurity!
“I went to Kashmir, with my family, for the very first time (post exodus) in 2005 when I was 16 years old. We travelled by road and as soon as I crossed Jawahar Tunnel, what I felt was surreal. The beauty around was breathtaking and it felt home. It was the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. I remember times were quite tense in the valley and I realised that when my mother took off her ‘bindi’ (a dot worn on forehead by Hindu women) while going through some villages. I can’t explain that feeling, when I saw my mother do that. That was the day I understood what our parents and grandparents had gone through.”
“I have been to Kashmir multiple times now, even a little before the pandemic started. I went there to learn Snowboarding. It was a breathtaking experience quite literally this time.”
“I remember on one trip to Kashmir, we were near Pulwama and I asked my Dad if we could go to our ancestral house. Dad’s friend who was a local of the area suggested we don’t. Sadly our home lies in an area where militancy is still predominant. Haven’t been there yet but my family did go after a few years. Dad couldn’t recognize his own locality; he couldn’t tell where his house stood. His home and memories were just a debris. It was burnt by the militants long ago. Roads had been built on our land. Temple land has been encroached upon. It is just too painful to share this story. The picture of the home that we once had sadly looks like a ruin. I try to imagine how it would have been but to be honest I am not able to.”
“My dad’s name was on the infamous hit list that was put up in the villages those days. So, in the first week of April,1990, we took a truck and put whatever belongings we could find and left the valley. I was just a year old and my mom was pregnant with my sister Ritika.”
“My dad’s cousin, Late Sh. Maharaj Krishan Bhat, was already staying in Jammu, so we landed directly at his house. He opened up a room for us and we all were huddled up in that room for a few days till we could find better accommodation. My parents were in Government jobs, so after a few months, they started getting their salaries. We were lucky I must say, some friends and relatives who owned businesses in Kashmir suffered immensely and had to move to migrant camps which trust me was not a good place to live in.”
“I remember Dad selling our Kashmir properties for a very low price so that we could build a home here in Jammu. I remember one guy from Kashmir who came to buy our property in a fancy car. He used to be the barber of the village. He was a rich man now.”
“And we were struggling to build a house. It took us a good 10 years to build a place which we could call ‘home’ again.”
What do you do with the sense of loss? You don’t stop living! You find joy in small things, you stay grateful, you learn to appreciate, you keep your head high and keeping moving on. You seek and teach, you absorb and reflect, you just keep walking.
“ I somehow find inspiration around me at home. Different people have inspired me in different aspects of life. My father (Mr. Ravinder Kumar Bhat) inspires me to work hard, my mom (Mrs. Bubly Kumari) inspires me to be brave, my wife (Nitika Bakhshi) motivates me to do what I love, she always supports me in following my passion even when it is very challenging like Boxing, Bike Tours or Snowboarding.”
“Other than family, a Kashmiri who inspired me during my childhood was Lal Ded. Despite facing so many hardships, she travelled on foot, survived on alms, and became a known Kashmiri spiritual leader.”
Rahul feels the disconnect from culture and language among his generation as they could never live in Kashmir.
“Most of my friends from Mumbai and other cities, have a place called ‘home’, where their neighbours are, where their roots are, but we Kashmiri Pandits don’t have that. Things like ‘Pheran’, ‘Khous’, ‘Kangri’ have become souvenirs from the past.”
“And, the more I talk to my fellow Kashmiri friends about it, I realise the feeling is mutual amongst all of us. My wife and I created a video titled Kashmir — ‘The Missing Roots’ to express this thought using a poem written by Aman Indra Kaul”
Watch here — https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DLw9g8hBuLc&t=11s
“ Sahibo from the J&K Tourism advertisement is my favorite Kashmiri Song. Fell in love with it immediately. I tried to sing it on my ‘Mehndiraat’ as well but forgot the lyrics in the middle. Another Kashmiri song that I really like is “Wesiye Yaaras Van”. I am not very familiar with names of Kashmiri singers but listen to many Kashmiri songs.”
Thrill is what keeps Rahul going and he gets that ‘thrill’ from sports and bikes. What is also fascinating is Rahul has been documenting home life, capturing family moments, travel and holidays. By picking up the camera he has captured candid moments, spontaneous events that include action and emotional elements .
“I got GoPro as a wedding gift from my wife and that was the start of a vlogging journey for us. We created a channel — Ramba Ho on YouTube. We started with travel vlogging but after realising there wasn’t enough content on Kashmiri Pandits on YouTube, we started creating content on Kashmiri culture and traditions as well.”
“The only hurdle in the vlogging journey has been getting good views on good content. I think this is consistent across YouTube and other entertainment industries.
Rahul has covered a range of topics, personal as well as cultural like Alzheimer’s & Kashmir, A Kashmiri Bride, Kaah Naethar, Pann, Making of Sheer Chai & Telvur, Kashmir — Missing Roots and so on.
“I created a travel series on Kashmir on our YouTube channel.”
Watch here shorturl.at/qtvGM
“I created this series to show what Kashmir has to offer, besides a beautiful landscape. It is also a place for an adventure junkie, be it Ski, Snowboarding or Snow-Cycling. Gulmarg is probably the cheapest place in the world to learn Ski and Snowboard. Kashmir has the potential to be the next Switzerland.”
Rahul has given an upbeat spin to his rootlessness, his simplicity is contagious, his hopefulness is inspiring. He has perhaps worked hard to shun resentment. He has captured facets of life that perhaps do not fit into elegantly curated boxes and he does this an unapologetic manner. Whilst this is about his own introspective journey, he shows the reality as it is, without too many filters, anyone can find their own story in his vlogs. It is an interesting way of preserving something that can be shared with generations to come — to help them appreciate what life was like. Simple vlogs of a young couple like many many people out there, leading ordinary lives, working hard, maybe living modestly, but actually living very extraordinary lives. They seem to be paying attention and staying grateful for what they have, not worried about the competition from talent out there, nor feeling intimidated — their theme, their expression, their contribution, their vlog!
“Like I said I sometimes feel uprooted. To be honest, I don’t think the roots can be connected fully anymore but a trip back home or a simple Kashmiri Birthday pooja makes me feel the Kashmiri in me. I do speak Kashmiri, thanks to my Dadi (Grandmother). She only knew Kashmiri. I am not fluent in it though. I often mix up words.”
“My wife makes sure we celebrate Kashmiri festivals and follow little rituals. I believe our language is the key to keeping us connected to our roots and I intend to pass this on to my son.”
“Born in Kashmir, schooling in Jammu, graduated in Mumbai and then worked in some South Indian cities, I don’t have a place to go back to which I can truly call home. I am sure some people would relate to this journey.”
“I got interested in coding in the last year of my engineering and became a mobile developer. I have been coding now for almost 10 years now and still love it. But, along with work I have always pursued other interests. Like a few years back, I got interested in Boxing, won the State Level Championship in Bangalore and represented Karnataka in Nationals.”
The mode of goodness conditions one to happiness, passion conditions him to the fruits of action ~ Bhagavad Gita 14.9
The Ramba-Ho man akin to the Rambi Ara in Wachi (the tributary to the River Jhelum) while feeds into the parent, into the mainstem before confluence, yet meanders through many pathways, carrying different shades, flowing along the journey of life, unrestricted yet entrenched. You may catch glimpses of a ‘Non-Kashmiri’ persona but don’t blame him, he did not choose exile, he did however choose to blend the past, present and the future into a sanguine storyboard.
~References:
*Bhagavad-Gītā As It Is — A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada (1986). Bhaktivedanta Book Trust.
~ Pictures Credit: Rahul Bhat
© Jheelaf Parimu
